Having My Cake. Eating It, Too || By Product Hoochie

when I offered up the idea for guest post for my blog I didn’t know if I’d get any bites… it is a baby beauty//lifestyle blog. to my surprise Jessica over at Product Hoochie not only replied but definitely gave an amazing post a bout her search for love. Her blog is one of the first I followed here on WordPress and I always enjoy the way she speaks to her audience through reviews, hauls, and just about anything she feels like adding to her corner. I urge you all to check out her page and enjoy her post here as well!

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I visited Buenos Aires in 2006. I had a lot of meat… from a cow.

I was never a girl with boyfriends. I knew there had to be a couple of boys that liked me but I never had a steady boyfriend longer than four months. I didn’t have a boyfriend in high school. I mean, I hung out with boys and “quasi-dated” a few but nothing like a lot of my friends experienced and I was fine with that.

As I embarked on my 20s, I wanted a special guy in my life. I watched my friends get engaged, married, and start having kids. And so I traveled to Europe and South America. I hit Italy, Holland, France, Belgium, Brazil, and Argentina over two years. I went into Manhattan and explored. I had some crazy nights on the Lower Eastside. I completed my master’s degree. I wasn’t sure what I was looking for romantically because my life was pretty full with fabulous experiences. Truth was, I was not lonely, but I had a lot to offer and the guys that I met didn’t seem to interest me enough to stick with them.

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A picture of the Cliffs of Moher from 2007. One of my favorite single (ha!) views of Ireland.

By the time I was 27, I had enough of “the search.” I decided I was going to serial date. I joined a dating website and blitzed it like it was my job. I had to do a lot of weeding. First, there was the guy that had no job and was so seemingly desperate for a woman that he sent me a message laden with grammatical errors. Hey, I make typos, too, and I break some rules, but this message was way beyond ridiculous. The message bothered me more than the unemployment, not that I was about to become anyone’s sugar mama. There were some nice guys, too, I just wasn’t feeling them.

One summer afternoon, I was with my friend Sin and told her, “I had enough. I’m signing off the dating site.” She looked at me and said, “Don’t do that. Stay on the rest of the summer. You never know.” I took her advice, stopped looking at profiles, and checked my account on occasion. Then one day, a very adorable man messaged me. I checked him out. He seemed normal and smart. He was well traveled. We decided to exchange real email addresses. I learned his real name and almost fell over. His last name was 16 letters long! 16?! No one had a longer last name than mine with 12 letters! I googled him. It was an odd enough last name that I figured if there was something I had to know, I would find it. Boy, did I find it! Turns out, my new “match” was a very successful and popular player of a card game. I almost fell over. I learned in a few more clicks that we had a very close mutual friend.

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This picture was taken at a wedding in a photo booth in March, 2008. We hadn’t even known each other a year yet.

We met on a date. He got hit on by a lesbian- yes, and she kissed him while I was in the bathroom. Walking along the avenue after a beer, we ran into an old friend of mine from high school. All of these strange things happened but I was not concerned because I had already realized I would spend the rest of my life with this man. I can’t remember why but something clicked within me and I knew. Sounds strange, but it was instinctual. I don’t think I ever told my husband this but maybe I did. I don’t think it would really surprise him. He thinks I caused the blackout at the Super Bowl.

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We were married July 15th, 2011. Our wedding song is the acoustic version of the Foo Fighters’ “Everlong.”

My point is I never had to go looking for a “him.” I just had to wait and enjoy my life- and I really did and still do. I might not have made my “wishes” come true. This is not to say that my husband would not have supported me then, but priorities change when you meet a person you want to spend time with. You should not expect a man or woman to change your life or make it complete. There are never any “completes.” Instead, you should look at your partner as an added bonus- you hit the jackpot and you get to share with someone you love. So be who want to be right now and do everything you want to do, whether it be to travel to France or jump out of a plane. Enjoy who you are- everything else is just cake.

ps! If any of you would like to guest post on any of the topics in the first paragraph (love, heartbreak, singledom, etc)please email me here ,I would love to have you! Thanks in advance!


Xx.

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